This week, in his weekly inspirational message from the Parsha, my friend Efryim/Barry Shore focuses on the Torah's prohibition to charge interest. In his usual way of playing with words, he notes that while one may not take financial interest, one must take interest in their fellow, in what is going on around them and even in themselves.
Building on that, there is a cognitive bias known as the frequency illusion where we pay selective attention to any which idea. For example, when one buys a new model car they suddenly notice that model everywhere they go. When you are thinking of an idea, you might notice that it pops up everywhere.
This happens to me all too often, and my friends tell me it happens to them. When one pays attention one will see that this phenomena happens to us all the time. It can be a story, a business deal, a chiddush, a dvar torah or whatever.
Sometimes, inspiration arrives from the most unexpected places, like a stray comment, a friend’s story, a sefer that happens to be laying at my table in shul or that I randomly pull off a shelf, something from social media etc.
When I write my weekly post, I never know when the idea is going to arrive. Sometimes Motzei Shabbos or Sunday morning, Thursday night or Tuesday. Other times, it doesn’t come. I’ve come to see all of these moments as gifts from Hashem. Inspiration needs to flow naturally and when it does it needs to be captured.
I have recently been thinking about this subject a lot and it culminated into a subtle and sensitive point that’s been turning over in my mind which led to realizing that the frequency illusion has been at high frequency this week as a result.
This realization led me to ask a question. Every week, hundreds—even thousands—of parsha pieces circulate: some scholarly and intricate, some more practical, some more poetic and abstract, others are so polished you can see your reflection in them, drawing on politics, headlines, current events. Usually, they are inspiring. However, I’ve noticed that I can almost feel an agenda being pushed into the parsha. It can be a frustration, a bias or a political note. At times, it is woven beautifully and it is inspirational. Although, I’ve come to wonder if Torah is being used for a purpose that isn’t its own.
Which leads me to ask myself, perhaps provocatively: am I guilty of the same thing? Maybe when I find myself weaving in my observations and points that I want to focus on for my own self-improvement, maybe that’s just my own bias finding a way in, coloring the draft without my realizing?
That question sent me back to an idea in Tzidkas HaTzaddik which I just happened to learn this past Shabbos. (That frequency thing again...) Rav Tzadok HaKohen writes1 that when one is learning or innovating in Torah, he must make sure there isn’t any bias in his heart. The motivation to learn should not come from glory-seeking, nor jealousy, and definitely not the desire to prove someone wrong. Torah comes only from a pure desire for truth. When the motive is pure, even a mistaken idea, a hava amina, is Torah. Because that first mistaken step is part of the path Hashem Himself lay for arriving at truth. But if your words are born from bias, then even if they are expressed in the most brilliant and resonant ways, it is not Torah at all. It’s poison dressed up as Torah.
That’s why Doeg HaEdomi’s words are remembered so differently than King Shaul’s. Shaul made mistakes, errors in judgment, but they were human errors. Doeg’s words were poisoned by jealousy. One was still Torah; the other became venom.
The Ramdu, Rav Moshe Dovid Vali, writes2 that sometimes he feels pulled to expand on a passage at length. But he makes it clear that his intention isn’t to show off his learning, nor to prove his worth, but simply because the Torah itself drew him in. The distinction is vital: is Torah drawing us forward, or are we dragging Torah in the service of our own needs?
Then I opened the Mei HaShiloach on the mitzvah of Shiluach HaKen.
The Ishbitzer notes something simple and profound: the mitzvah applies only when the nest "happens upon you." You can’t set it up, orchestrate it, climb the tree and stage the nest. It comes unbidden.
That, I realized, is the answer to my question. Bias is when you go out hunting for a way to stuff your own agenda into the parsha. Torah, real Torah, is when you wait until it comes to you. When you open yourself and show interest in that which surrounds you and perceive it all as a gift.
Sometimes you’ll miss it or get it wrong, or it won’t come at all. But when it does, and when it’s honest, then even the initial thought, the hava amina, is Torah.
Steve Savitsky, President Emeritus of the Orthodox Union, wrote a book called Ken Tzippor, which is full of amazing and fascinating stories, stories that happened “spontaneously” and someone took notice. He saw the mitzvah of Shiluach Haken as a mitzvah to understand the stories which surround us and only we can share them.
Sometimes we feel an emptiness, or lack of inspiration. Many writers bemoan their lack of inspiration, calling it writer’s block. The remedy to this is discussed extensively by many writers. Steven Pressfield, in The War of Art, (a great book for Elul) calls this Resistance; we might call it the yetzer hara. He offers tools to beat it. Rick Rubin, in The Creative Act, says it even plainer: the flow of creativity doesn’t stop, we just choose not to engage it. An impasse can be a kind of making, a block of our own making. “A decision, conscious or un-conscious, not to participate in the stream of productive energy that is available to us at all times.”
If we loosen the analytic grip, the flow can find a path through us more easily. Many times, the answer sits right in front of our eyes. The material for our work surrounds us.
He writes “[It] is worth considering in difficult moments when we appear to be stuck, to have lost our way, to have nothing left to give. What if this is all a story?””
He writes further, and this is a paragraph that I keep coming back to: “if you are open and stay tuned to what's happening, the answers will be revealed.... to hear whispers, the mind must also be quiet…. sometimes the words seem to arise from the outside and other times the inside. Whatever route the information arrives through, we allow it to come by grace, not effort. The whisper cannot be wrestled into existence, only welcomed with an open state of mind.”
My friend Rav Joey Rosenfeld recently wrote about the blank page as an emptiness that feels like a blockade. “To begin writing feels like an impossible task. The blank space precedes the word. The emptiness covers over the possibility of emergence. What purpose could there possibly be in writing more words? What has not been written. There is an emptiness that blocks the entrance of something new. Empty of all space, nowhere to go. The blockage comes in the form of an invisible resistance that pushes back against the forward moving flow. Something stands in the way. What is it that stands in the way other than nothing itself. There is no blockage, only the resistance that redoubles back towards the source from whence it emerged. The emptiness enters from all sides. It blocks the possibility of addition. The active negation of the word that the blank space reveals is endless. Unbounded by marks and engravings, the empty space spreads out beyond itself, erasing the possibility of new writing...”
We talk about writer’s block as if it’s real. As if the well has run dry and as if the words have packed up and left. However, that's not actually true. The current never really stops. What we call a block is just us standing at the edge, refusing to step in.
If you’re stuck with a blank page and the words feel slow, remember: the current is always running. The block is only an illusion.
Rubin puts it plainly: The world is full of small inspirations waiting to be noticed. Make it a habit to pause and observe your surroundings. Use what you see to fuel your work.
This relates to the opportunity which Elul presents where we can feel stuck while HaShem is right there. He is ready for us to open ourselves to His presence. When we feel that Hashem is with us all the time, we realize that things don't just happen to us. Rather they happen for us. If we do try to see providence, we will immediately see it in every single step! Once we see it, we have it. With present-moment awareness, each interaction arrives exactly when meant to and that is Hashgacha Pratis. Then you have a story to share, you have a post to write, you have something to share with your family at the shabbos table. We can even uplift ourselves.
Elul is a time to challenge ourselves to grow higher. I want to challenge you to find the stories in your life and then share them. Then inspire others to also find the inspiration that is right there in front of us, waiting to be noticed.
There are times when we see clearly how the different events that happen are connected, and that is a blessing. There are times, when we do not clearly see the dots connecting, yet we see the dots and at the right time, when looking back, we will understand the blessing therein.
When we get past the “illusion of illusion”, we may find that the “illusion of frequency” isn’t an illusion at all, it’s a hint of ruach hakodesh.
The mitzvah of Shiluach HaKen only applies when the nest happens upon you. It can only be Divinely orchestrated and noticed by man. Torah works the same way. We take real interest in what is around us, in the people beside us, and in the stirrings inside us, and we let the gift arrive.
When we are open to receiving the gift, the so-called frequency illusion starts to look like something else, a quiet form of Hashgacha Pratis. Some weeks the dots connect, other weeks you only see dots. Both are invitations. This Elul, look up, notice one story that lands in your lap, and share it. May the nest find you easily and may you take positive interest, letting Torah draw you forward.
#115
Ki Teitze, Shluach haKen
Shui, this was epic, thank you!!! I don’t think I have ever read anything that connects a parsha to writing and this is great chizuk for everyone. The blank page can be a hard decision in life, an uncomfortable conversation you have to have, or the change you need to make in yourself. There is a mental difference between “forcing yourself” and taking a step forward.
This clarifies why it’s always suggested in book on writing and from any writer to, “write every day.” It’s not just getting into the habit or forcing yourself, it’s opening yourself up to the creative flow.